Developing a Trust Program

It’s summer! Which means things are a little ‘lax around our house. But I hope everyone is having an amazing summer of camping, boating, swimming, grilling or hanging out with those you love. I know our family has taken advantage of these activities.

As I’ve mention if the past, we live in rural Colorado which allows us access to amazing camping in the backcountry where cellphone and Internet coverage doesn’t exist. There are days when I’m camping that I don’t even pick up my cellphone. On our most recent camping trip I lost my cellphone in my sleeping bag for two days and didn’t even miss it.

I relish this time because it allows me to unplug from the world and plug in with God. My camping trip came at a perfect time, since I had been angry all week about projects at work going sideways, my ex husband not communicating about our kiddos and a host of other small things which led me to blow up at my husband. Through no fault of his own, he was late picking me up after work. My car was still in the shop a week after the mechanic said it would be done. (FYI – I still don’t have my car back. Shipping parts takes a long time out here, but the scenery can’t be beat!)

My husband took the brunt of a really awful week that even included me raging at God in my journal and asking where he was in the mess of my life, most of which I created. God really had no obligation to show up and fix my mess. However, He showed up on Saturday morning, when I was up with the sun and the rest of my crew were still snoring away in their sleeping bags. As I journaled my frustrations to God, again, it was as if, He put a halt to my hurt and anger. There was a feeling of relief as I understood even though this mess was my making, God was willing to carry my burden. The Bible says, “Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” Matthew 6:26‭-‬27 NIV.

This has been a verse repeated to me throughout my life. See, I’m a worrier and a fixer or problem solver. So many cautionary stories in the Bible stem from people not waiting on God, but trying to make things happen or fix situations in their own way. It always turns out bad, like impacting generations to come, bad.

I realized, the anger from last week was a result of doubting God had everything in control and that He heard my pleas for help. I wish I could say everything is great and God swooped in at the last minute and saved the day. Yes, sometimes that is how God works, but in my case, this appears to be a growth and trust opportunity program between me and God. He hasn’t stepped away, but He’s allowing me to pursue Him to trust Him more and myself less. Where are you at in developing your trust program with God?