Author: Kris Valdez

Godly Goals

Posted on by Kris Valdez

On Monday, it’s New Years. New Years is about fresh starts and creating a path for a more productive year. But what if we take our goals and then tell God how we’d like them fulfilled? Is that what God wants from us? I don’t think so. In Proverbs 16:9 (NLT) it states, “We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.” God wants us to work on our goals with Him and through Him. Instead, it says in Proverbs 16:3 (NIV) we are to “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”

What does it look like to have a Godly goal? Is this something that we pursue while neglecting everything else in our lives? Should we be so hyperfocused on our goals that we push away all the other blessings God has put in our lives?

Another course is that we go with the flow and don’t take action until God gives us clear direction. It’s as if we have dug in our spiritual heels and we aren’t moving until God gives us an answer or gives us our own way.

Or we are so fearful that the thought of stepping out and doing anything sends us into a tailspin of wondering if we are doing the right thing. In the business world, we call this analysis paralysis. We become so concerned with making sure we don’t make a wrong move that we don’t do anything.

God will honor us stepping out in faith with the goals that we think He has given us. Even if we are on the wrong path, He will gently correct our course if we live close to Him. However, developing a list of goals outside of consulting God can be an exercise in futility. Trust me. I know. I have the t-shirt.

For years, I would spend time developing goals in the vacuum of my mind. Without consultation with others or with God, I would get a wild idea and pursue it. God isn’t going to honor the ideas that come from the latest webinar sales pitch. I love a good marketing pitch and many times I’ve bought whatever program they are selling without thinking it through. I cringe at the idea of how much time and money I’ve wasted pursuing things that weren’t God’s best for me.

This goes back to the Bible verse above, “We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.” Proverbs 16:9 (NLT). We can make whatever plans we want, but ultimately, God is in control. He is the one the gives us every good thing and allows trials into our lives. Nothing, absolutely nothing, touches our lives without the permission of God. Therefore, it’s imperative that we develop our goals for 2018 in conjunction with the One who determines our steps.

Here are four ways to develop goals that are in step with God.

  1. Get alone with God. This is crucial to hearing what goals He wants us to purse. We can’t hear God, unless we spend time alone with Him. I sometimes find myself, waiting to be spoon fed the Word. This isn’t what we have been called to do. I need create a habit of spending time with God, in my prayer journal, but also reading the Bible.
  2. Write it down. This may seem weird at first, but it will get easier the more time we spend alone with God. Write down what you hear during the time that you’ve gotten alone with God. He speaks to us in a way that is most impactful to our heart. God wants us to pay attention to Him and He does this through speaking to us when we are quiet with Him.
  3. Act it out. This means getting into action. We can’t come before God, make our requests, and then sit, waiting for God to move. There is a story in the Bible about the man with the mat by the pool of water. (John 5:1-15) Jesus asked if he wanted to be healed. Of course the man said yes, but answered that he was too slow to get to the pool. Then Jesus told him what he must do. Rise and walk. Do you need to rise and walk to what God has called you to do?
  4. Let it go. This is another way of saying, leave the results up to God. When we have done our part, it’s up to God for doors to open or other paths to be revealed. If we have completed what God has commanded us to do, then we can rest in the assurance that everything will work out according to God’s will.

I’ve leave you with these four questions: Are you spending time alone with God? Are you writing down what you hear? Do you need to take action on what you’ve heard? Do you need to leave the results to God? Answer these in the comments below to encourage others on their journey for Godly goals for their life.

Firmer Foundation

Posted on by Kris Valdez

I have a confession to make. My security hasn’t always come from the One who promises a firm foundation. We are instructed to build our lives on the foundation of God. Jesus spoke of how important it is to live by His teachings. The word important, doesn’t paint the picture I truly want to convey here. It is critical, vital, life saving even, to build our lives on the Rock that has stood the test of time.

In Matthew 7:24-27 (NLT) it says, “Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”

This is an important concept from a Biblical perspective. It’s mentioned again in Luke 6: 46-49 (NLT). It states, “So why do you keep calling me ‘Lord, Lord!’ when you don’t do what I say? I will show you what it’s like when someone comes to me, listens to my teaching, and then follows it. It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. But anyone who hears and doesn’t obey is like a person who builds a house right on the ground, without a foundation. When the floods sweep down against that house, it will collapse into a heap of ruins.”

The teaching we are supposed to be listening to is God, not the ones offered by the world. When I build my foundation on anything other than His Word, when the rains come and the flood waters rise, my foundation will not be stable.

Part of my day job is analyzing development plans, checking they will work with the location of any proposed development. As a land use planner, I also review building permits and part of the process is to ensure structures are located outside of flood waters. This is critical for where I live in the mountains of Colorado because when the snow melts every spring, the rivers rise and floods are likely to happen.

Many historical structures in our community didn’t have the technology we have today in order to place their homes outside of floodplains. In the heavy snow seasons, while great for the surrounding ski resorts, it isn’t the best for these homes located along the rivers.

A few structures have been destroyed in the time I’ve lived here. Instead of these homes getting to rebuild where they previously were, they are placed on higher ground with a firmer foundation. Obviously, in this world there isn’t a guarantee that destruction can be avoided, but we can take steps to mitigate the potential hazards.

How do we mitigate the hazards of our lives? It’s one thing for me to clearly see lines on a map where something can be placed. It’s in a safe zone or it’s not.

My life doesn’t work like that. Does your life?

My close friends and I have discussed how our lives seem to get more out of control, instead of being predictable and safe. Maybe God is keeping us on our toes or the more likely scenario is He desires us to build a firmer foundation with Him along with His teachings. I struggle with this.

Similar to my job, I want a clear path to what the firmer foundation looks like. Am I taking the right steps to grow in my relationship with God? Am I doing enough of those steps to create a firmer foundation? Am I giving enough effort to those steps?

How would you answer these questions? Everyone has a unique journey God wants to take them on. My answers will look nothing like yours and that’s awesome! It means God is creating a special path to building a firmer foundation designed for each one of us.

Encourage others by sharing in the comments below how you create a firmer foundation and what journey God is taking you on.

Deeper Dependence

Posted on by Kris Valdez

Deeper dependence. I want to depend on God, but on days where it feels like the world in stronger than my faith, my dependence is shaken rather than strengthened. However, how can I achieve this deeper dependence on God rather than relying on myself?

What does it mean to have deeper dependence and what does it look like? Can we cultivate a deeper dependence or should we? Is it worth our time? Developing a deeper dependence depends on what we’re depending on for our security.

(Did you see how many times I put the word dependence in one sentence? Editors everywhere are clutching their red correcting pens, wanting to swipe them across the computer screen right now.)

I compare my dependence on God like watching my six year old try to pour milk on his cereal. “Don’t worry mom, I’ve got this,” he says in his cute sing song voice on a Saturday morning. I know I can help him, but I also know sometimes he has to learn to do things for himself. Until the milk spills all over my counter and I begin practicing deep breathing to not yell over spilled milk. Yet, he learned he wasn’t quite ready to pour his milk. Next time, he asked me to help him.

It’s not my intention to keep my son dependent on me for his whole life. The last thing I want is for him to need someone else to pour milk on his cereal in college. But sometimes I’m this way with God. Instead of having a dependent attitude where I bring everything to Him, I say, “Don’t worry, God, I’ve got this.” I have the mental mentality that I can do things without God’s help.

Yes, it’s true we can accomplish things, sometimes even great things in our lives without the help of God. But at what cost? It costs our dependence on God and allowing Him the opportunity to work in our lives. Imagine if I had taken what I had and given it to God to bless before I had used it.

The parable of the boy who gave Jesus five loaves of bread and two fish comes to mind. He gave everything he had for Jesus to use. Instead of feeding a few people, Jesus took this small offering and fed five thousand. You can read the full story here.

When I’m completely dependent on God and give Him everything that I have, He can take it and bless thousands if that’s His will. Or it can be an offering between God and myself that only we know about.

The question I ask myself is, am I willing to develop a deeper dependence on God? Am I willing to trust Him with the big things and the small things in my life?

Dare I say, it’s the small things that help build our dependence with God. By trusting Him with the little things everyday, it builds our faith that He can be trusted when the big storms of life come along that attempt to drag us down. We know God has us protected because we’ve seen Him work out the little things that maybe in the past we thought would be meaningless to Him.

My friend, let me tell you, nothing is meaningless in our lives to God. He wants us to have a dependence so deep on Him, we can’t go a day, an hour, a minute without being in communication with Him.

This dependence is not out of obligation. Rather it is out of praise, awe and reverence for what

He has done for us. I’m embarrassed to say there are times in my life, where I’ve had the attitude of what has God done for me lately?

Then I need a reality check.

While it might not be lately, the ultimate deed was completed over 2,000 years ago through a cross on Calvary. Jesus hung on a cross for crimes He didn’t commit.

For me.

And for you.

Even if you or I were the only people on earth, He would have willing died a criminal’s death to save us from living in eternity without Him. All He asks of us in return is the believe in Him. To ask Him into our lives.

Instead of forcing Himself on us, He quietly waits for an invitation. An invitation that allows us to have more dependence on Him and less on ourselves. Imagine relying so heavily on God that the fear and the lies the enemy tries to whisper to our hearts never get a foothold because we know the author of the Truth intimately through depending on Him for everything.

He can allow us to step back from Him, but He will never step back from us. When we stop depending on Him, He won’t force Himself back into our lives. It’s not until we seek Him, that we will find Him.

Do you want to develop a deeper dependence on God? How are you going to do it? Share it in the comments below to encourage others.

Persistent Peace

Posted on by Kris Valdez

Keeping the peace in my family is challenging with three kids all excited about Christmas and what Santa will leave under the tree. Even my 14 year old still believes in Santa, although I think she’s hedging her bets because Santa brings things off her wish list when Mom and Dad say, “Absolutely not!”

Keeping the peace with family members over the holidays can take divine intervention depending on our family dynamics. A dead end to seeking out persistent peace comes from seeking out things of this world we believe will give us peace, but only for a short time, if at all.

But, we can have persistent peace from God.

This is a peace which comes from a prince. The Prince of Peace actually. Isaiah 9:6 says, “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” This verse is rather timely with Jesus’ birthday right around the corner.

Jesus is the author of peace. He designed us to live in peace with Him. Now, this doesn’t mean there will be peace on earth. Sorry, to burst your bubble if you are the beauty queen contestant and your answer of what you want to accomplish during your reign is world peace. It isn’t going to happen until the second coming of Christ, but that’s a different blog post.

This is a peace we receive by walking close to God, close to His will for our lives. There is no safer place than to be within the will of God for our lives. If you have a question about what God’s will for your life is, check out this past post. In John 14:27 (NIV) it says, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”

If there are things in our lives causing us to feel troubled and afraid, we need to lay those down at the foot of the cross. I will admit, I’m not a shining example of this. I’ll lay my trials at the gracious feet of Jesus, only to pick them up again because I don’t trust God to take care of it or I don’t see things moving in a timely manner. I figure God might need some help or advice with my request, right? Wrong! Oh, so very, very wrong on my part.

It’s with trust that I feel His persistent peace. Yes, the trial may be of my own making, but God in His grace, still offers me peace as I go through it, if I’m willing to accept it. No helping, no suggestions, only trust.

Trusting God has heard my pleas for help, for justice, or for validation. He hears it all and I believe, the moment I make the request known to Him, He begins to work. Don’t take my word for it take it as the Word says, 1 John 5:14-15 (NIV), “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.”

I wonder if I hinder my answers and my peace when I start to meddle in the affairs of God? I don’t know about my answers, but oh, how I lose my peace when I’m not walking in step with my Savior. To obtain a persistent peace, it’s about surrendering, sometimes over and over again, to the will of God. I know when I do, there will be peace in abundance for my life.

How do you get persistent peace? Share it in the comments below to encourage others.

Being Enough

Posted on by Kris Valdez

When is enough, enough? As the holidays are in full swing, it feels like there isn’t enough of us to go around. Getting up and putting one foot in front of another seems to take all our effort. There’s no end in sight, except on January 2nd, if we can hold on until then.

What if we said, enough is enough? We drop the “should’s” of the holiday “to do” lists and do what is enough? Let go of expectations and obligations. What if being present is enough? What if we start trusting God with where He wants us, where He wants our efforts? What if we decide to forgo the rushing, pushing and scarcity mindset? What if we take a step back, enjoy the moment and discover what God is teaching us?

For me, sometimes, the holidays brings out the worst in me, when it should be bringing out the best. Instead of loving on my family, I see them as not doing things right the first time or getting in the way of the mission of Christmas.

Yes, I just compared my Christmas to a military mission. As a full time working parent with three kids, in three different schools, life seems like it’s more about logistics than it is about love. It’s a cycle I want to stop this holiday season.

I want to let go of what I think my house should look like or the amount of presents the area under the tree can hold. What if I took a minimalist approach this holiday season?

Me, authentically being me, is enough.

No frills, no bells and whistles.

Not perfect, but present.

Yes, there are some traditions I want to keep alive, such as the moving train under our Christmas tree which puffs out fake smoke. I probably enjoy the train more than my kids anyway.

The tradition I want to let go of is the need to have a Christmas which matches the expectations of my social media accounts. After the failed french toast in the crockpot last Christmas morning from a recipe found on Pinterest, my kids would prefer french toast the old fashion way instead of creating a shortcut so we can get going about the day faster.

But what if I looked at cutting out the pressure I put on myself this holiday season and only took on what God wants me to do? Is that enough? What is the purpose of the holiday season anyway? Is it the gifts, the food, and the parties? Or is it pointing ourselves and others to the one true Gift of the season?

The birth of our Savior.

We are enough because He is enough.

Let me say that again, we are enough because He is enough.

There isn’t anything we can do to earn our salvation. Contrary to what many think, good works don’t get us into heaven. In Ephesians 2:8-9 (NLV) it says, “For by His loving-favor you have been saved from the punishment of sin through faith. It is not by anything you have done. It is a gift of God. It is not given to you because you worked for it. If you could work for it, you would be proud.”

This holiday season, what are we working for? Are we working for the approval of others or are we working to point others to the gift of eternal salvation?

All God asks of us is to come to Him just as we are.

Nothing more, nothing less.

It doesn’t matter what we’ve done in the past or the condition of our heart. To Him, we are enough because He fills in the blank spaces of our lives with His love and cleans the dirty corners of our heart with His forgiveness.

There’s nothing we can do that changes God’s love for us. Romans 8:38 (NIV) shows us this promise, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

I challenge us this holiday season to say enough is enough while accepting the gift of eternal love.

Are you ready to say enough is enough? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Fighting Fear

Posted on by Kris Valdez

Fear is tough. It can paralyze us. It can stop the work God wasn’t to do in our live because we can’t image taking one more step on the path God has laid out for us. Moving towards the dreams He’s put in our hearts becomes almost impossible with fear. The sweaty palms, hearts racing, continually replaying the what if’s and the if only’s in our mind.

It all comes down to fear.

Fear of the unknown, fear of what we’ve done, fear of being found out or fear of not being enough. These are all the weapons the enemy uses to keep us from our God given purpose.

Do not let the enemy win. Let me say it again.

Do not let the enemy win!

We need to fight the fear that he is shooting at our dreams and protect our heart from the lies he whispers to us. So how do we keep from going under to fear? Here are four ways to fight using the word F.E.A.R.

F=Fight: Part of fighting is to know when to fight and when to allow someone else to fight the battle. In fighting fear, it’s about allowing God out on the battlefield first. God, along with His truth can clear the way for us. How do we do this? We pray His truth into our lives.

For example, in Deuteronomy 20:4 (NIV) it says, “For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory,” and in Exodus 14:14 (NIV) it says, “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” When it comes to fear, the Lord will go before us and clear the battlefield. He wants us to be successful and overcome the fear and doubts the enemy has planted in our hearts with deceit. When we fight, we fight fear with the Truth. This Truth will encourage us which leads me to my next letter.

E=Encouragement: To fight our fears we need the encouragement of others. This comes with getting together with other believers. It could be a small group which meets in our home or church. It could be someone you meet with on a regular basis to build each other up. It we are complete introverts, our fellowship can come from the encouragement contained in God’s Word. In 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (ESV) it says, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”

In this world it seems to be a pastime to tear others down. I know I’m guilt of this. Tearing each other down grows our fears rather than fighting them. God has called us to be encouragers of one another and build each other up. We not only do this with believers, but with non-believers as well. It will show God’s love through our actions, which leads to the next point.

A=Action: One of the best ways to combat fear is through taking action. Sometimes the fear of getting started is worse than actually getting the task done. By getting into action or activity with the thing we fear most, it reduces the fear or eliminates it completely. There are reasons behind our fear. It could be a healthy fear to keep us safe or it could be a fear meant to keep us from growing and achieving our dreams.

The important thing is to know the difference. How do we know the difference?

By listening to the will of God.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve made decisions based on a position of fear rather than faith. When I’ve made a decision in fear, it has always turned out badly. When I’ve stepped out in faith, the rewards are too sweet to comprehend.

The Lord rewards the action of those stepping out in faith. Once we take our God directed action, we are ready for the final step, Receive.

R=Receive: When we step out of our fear and do what God calls us to do, we receive His blessings and favor. These blessings and favor may come in different forms. This doesn’t always mean monetary things.

The blessings could be an overwhelming peace during a trial, where in the past fear would have manifested. The blessing could be a repaired relationship that didn’t look like forgiveness would ever be forthcoming. It could be in a sunset at the end of a rough day which awashes the sky in orange, pinks, and blues easing the frustrations with the beauty of God’s creation.

God chooses blessings unique to us. No two people are created alike and no two blessings are exactly the same. God is the ultimate creative and He wants us to receive the blessings He’s offering. If you reject His favor because of fear, it greatly saddens Him.

Many people, myself included, have rejected, the blessings He’s readily given because of fear. For me, if it looked like I had too much, I had decided people might be thinking less of me because God has blessed me and not answered their prayer. Or worse, not thinking it was worth the effort to open my hand to God.

Ouch.

Now that I’m a parent, I have a better idea of how it hurts when I’ve crafted a surprise gift for my kids and they reject it. As tuned in as I try to be with my kids, I don’t always hit the mark and it shows in their faces. A six year old can’t hide disappointment with a gift.

But God knows me inside and out along with all my faults, but still wants to give me a blessing if I’m willing to receive it. Actually, He’s willing to keep showering us with gifts until we see them as blessings.

Ask God to open your eyes to the blessings He’s given you to fight fear and watch in wonder all He’s doing around you.

Is there a way you fight fear? Share it in the comments below to help and encourage others.

Short Cuts = Dead Ends

Posted on by Kris Valdez

With the rush of the holidays, I’m all for shortcuts. I don’t make stuffing from scratch, stovetop is just fine. Starting things from scratch when I’m feeding 16 people at Thanksgiving dinner isn’t happening. Did I mention that most of those 16 hungry people are firefighters who keep going into the kitchen trying to sneak bits and pieces of Thanksgiving dinner? I need all the shortcuts I can get on turkey day?

Unfortunately, when it comes to a relationship with God, shortcuts only equal dead ends. We can’t speed up God’s timing for our growth. God has a unique path for us to walk, but he will not let us fall, but we may stumble.

In Psalm 37:23-24 (NIV) it says, “The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand.” Let’s unpack this verse a little. Here are three points that I’ve taken away from this verse.

  1. Delighting in God: We want the Lord to delight in our ways so we are able to stand firm. What does this mean exactly? How can we delight the Lord? Through an attitude of gratitude. This may sound simple, but on some days it’s hard to be grateful for the things God has placed along our journey. He has allowed trials into our lives to make us grow and draw closer to Him. Dare, I say it, to grow our heart of gratitude? It’s in those events which look like complete disasters when God offers His greatest blessing. It could be a chance to start over, to begin a new chapter in the book God has written for us. Are you grateful for the story God has for you? If not start by thanking God for the little things you know come from Him and build on it.
  2. Mistakes Happen: The verse states, though we stumble, God will not let us fall. It’s not if or maybe, it’s when we stumble. If we try taking shortcuts from the path God wants us to walk, we are no longer delighting Him. We won’t just stumble, we will be out of the will of God. There is purpose to the pain. Unfortunately, we might not know what it is until we see God face to face. The point is, God knows we will make mistakes. There are no surprises to God. So when we stumble, we can rest assured that God will not let us fall if we are delighting Him.
  3. Holding On: The verse goes on to say, “…for the Lord upholds him with his hand.” God will uphold us. What exactly does this mean? According to Merriam-Webster it means, “to give support, to give support against an opponent, to keep elevated, or to lift up.” God provides us the ability to hold on. He will provide us support and support against our opponents. He will never let us fall if we delight ourselves in Him. There is nothing He will let come to us without a purpose. God has a mighty plan for our lives and He will bring it to fruition if we don’t take shortcuts which only lead to dead ends. We delight ourselves in Him so He can show us our true path.

How do you feel the delight of God? Share in the comments below to encourage others.

Amazed by Grace

Posted on by Kris Valdez

When I mention the word, grace, what pops into your head? Maybe the famous song, Amazing Grace? Or something extended to you in a moment of weakness? I previously wrote about a police officer extending me grace by not giving me a well deserved speeding ticket.

Then there is the ultimate grace.

God’s grace.

The one freely given to us.

This grace is truly sweet to my starving soul. The grace God has bestowed on my life is nothing less than miraculous. You may think this is an exaggeration, but allow me to share a few examples.

In college I couldn’t run fast enough from God. His rules for life seemed to hinder what I thought college was about. College was about getting an education, of course, but it was also about figuring out how to live life. I was finally on my own, sort of, and I wanted to try out my new independence.

Oh, the choices I made!

Most of which went against God. I thought these decision were part of college, part of the fun and life experiences it has to offer. Instead it led to the destruction of my relationship with God and turning my back on Him. Instead of obeying Him, I wanted to figure it out of my own. This meant falling into a career path that I struggle in, even though it comes somewhat easily to me. This path has been one of growing through grace back to God. He is showing me grace at a level which amazes me.

My first marriage didn’t turn out as I had envisioned, but out of the hurt and struggle, I was blessed with two amazing, beautiful, healthy children seeking to know God.

Then God gave me grace by bringing a strong Christian man into my life. He loves our own child just as much as his step children. Although, never once has he referred to them as step children. They have and will always be, his kids.

When I feel like I’m at the end of my rope, my husband raises me up in prayer and extends me grace when I have those moments where I need to ugly cry until I have nothing left or I take a bad day out on him. I can’t get any better than that in a husband.

Make no mistake, these gifts are for nothing I have done. It is by the grace of God. He has seen my mistakes, and still loves me enough to take me out of the muck and mire I’ve made of my life. He gives me gifts of His love even when I didn’t deserve them.

There isn’t anything we can do to deserve this gift of amazing grace. It’s simply a gift we can choose to accept or reject.

Will you accept the gift of amazing grace? Share in the comments below how God has amazed you with grace so others can be encouraged.

Listen with Heart

Posted on by Kris Valdez

The heart. It’s one of the most talked-about components of the Bible. Entire modern day books have been written about it. The Bible has instructions for it and in Proverbs 4:23 (NIV) it says, “Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” If everything we do flows from the heart, how can we guard it so what flows out of it is honoring to God?

By listening with our heart.

When we listen to God with our heart, we are allowing Him to guide our steps. When we listen to those around us with our heart, we honor God by taking care of His children, whom He dearly loves. I would even venture to say our heart is how God views us.

So how does God view our heart? I’m so glad you asked. Also in Proverbs 27:19, (NIV) its says, “As water reflects the face, so one’s life reflects the heart.” The heart is a reflection of our true selves. There is no hiding our hearts from God or what motivates us. Are we listening with our hearts to get something from another person? Or are we listening to God with our hearts to impress someone else? In both of these instances this is not authentically listening with our hearts. I believe God sees this. He wants us to reach each other at the heart level.

How can we listen with our hearts? Here are three ways.

  1. Take time. This means taking the time and creating space to hear the other person. Turn off our phones, tablets, and other electronic devices to eliminate any possible distraction to hearing what the other person has to say. We need to make space to truly hear what the other person is saying. Every person wants to be heard at the heart level.
  2. Speak words of kindness. When we hear what the other person is saying, we need to communicate with kindness. The other person may need correction to what they’re sharing, but we can do this with kindness and without judgment. In Proverbs 27:17 (NIV) it says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Speaking correction can be done with gentleness as we listen with our heart. We can speak the correction in a way that lifts the other person up, rather than tears them down, but this also takes time which is why step number one is so important. The third way we can listen with our heart is with forgiveness.
  3. Forgiveness. When we truly listen to someone else’s heart, it isn’t always good. They could be lashing out at us in pain and saying things not really intended for us, but we are the closest person in the line of fire. It takes a level of forgiveness and understanding to let what that person says or does roll off our back. We need to forgive them in their time of pain and realize they aren’t lashing out at us, but at something outside of themselves. If we are at fault, then we need to seek their forgiveness and repair the relationship, if possible, and turn it over to God work on the other person’s heart. The critical thing to know is healing begins with forgiveness.

How do you listen with your heart? Share in the comments below to encourage others.

Breaking Our Mask

Posted on by Kris Valdez

As the kids put on masks for Halloween, I wonder how many masks I wear in a day to get through until I crawl into bed at night. There is the happy mask I slap on at the office when clients are yelling at me for things in which I have no control over. Then there’s the mask I sometimes wear with friends to let them know everything is alright, even when it’s not. There’s the mask I wear at my kids’ school in hopes other parents don’t see how little I have it all together.

The irony is that on this blog, where I can’t look people in the eye, is the one place I don’t need to wear a mask. It’s probably one of the main reasons I like writing this blog so much. I can just be me and if one of my commenters doesn’t like it, then so be it. For some reason the virtual world has the ability to be the great equalizer where we can create whomever we want to be or be as authentic as we want.

Keeping up the mask, ensuring there is no crack in it, is exhausting. I am exhausted. Can I get an amen from the back?

What if we let go of our mask? Let go if the parts we play for the expectation of others? What if we turned to the One who never rejects us, but He felt the ultimate rejection to pay for our sins? What if we took off all the mess we have and laid them it at the foot of the cross?

God created us. He knows what’s in our true hearts. In Psalm 139:13 (NIV) it says, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” He truly sees the real us. He fully accepts us. Let me say it again my friend, He fully accepts us.

All of us.

Our faults.

Our fears.

Our failures.

Not only does He accept us, but He loves us unconditionally. There is nothing that can separate us from His love if we are willing to accept the invitation He offers to all of us, freely. In Romans 8:38-39 (NIV) it says, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

There are no exceptions to His love. We can drop the mess and grab a hold of the truth. Yes, when we drop our mess, those around us might not like it and we may even be rejected by friends or family, but we can turn to Jesus. He knows what it’s like to feel rejection for walking the path to our purpose.

Jesus’s whole life lead to the cross. It wasn’t what He wanted to do. He asked God to take it away because He knew the physical cost of what He was about to enter.

He did it anyway.

For you and for me.

All we need to do is drop our masks at the foot of the cross and accept the freedom God offers us. If this is a gift you seek, a freedom you crave, and a step you’re willing to take, pray this simple prayer, “Lord I’m tired of wearing all my masks. I want the freedom you offer for my sin. Please wash me clean of my past. Guide my present thoughts and actions. Help me to trust you with my future. I asked you to come live in my heart. I thank you for the gift of spending eternity with you.”

If you pray this prayer, please share it with us so we can throw a party or if you want to contact me individually so we can celebrate one-on-one do you so here I encourage all of us to drop our masks and live authentically with God.