Three Ways to Move Beyond Disappointment

Have you ever dealt with disappointment? This month my daughter tried out for the fall play at school. Even though she worked hard on her audition song and lines, the part she wanted didn’t materialized. She’s part of the general cast instead of one of the smaller lead parts she wanted. I wish I could have taken away her disappointment, but I couldn’t give her what she wanted because the directors knew the full cast and what was best for the entire production.

There have been many times I’ve been disappointed in God. I prayed for something, such as a new job or resolution to a difficult situation. I even had my friends and family pray for the same things. These are the spiritual warriors in my life. The people I believe have God on speed dial. (FYI – I now know we can all have God on speed dial.) I thought my prayer requests were in the bag, so to speak. However, like the directors in my daughter’s play, God knows the entire production and the full cast to further His kingdom, not my personal agenda.

The challenging part is to keep this in mind and not become resentful of God for not answering a prayer request the way I wanted. It sounds selfish as I sit here and write this. Like the God who created the universe for His glory and to draw people closer to Him would bend the world to my will. Not so much.

I know God hears my prayers, but He answers them in His own timing and in His own way. How can we get over the disappoint of not getting a made to order prayer request answered? Here are three suggestions to move beyond the disappointment.

1. Work through resentment. God is a tough guy, meaning he can handle our resentment, our frustration, our anger, our fear and whatever other emotion we can tie to the disappointment. He can take our emotions and work with them. I normally start experiencing problems when I use my negative emotions to keep me from God. It damages my relationship with Him and instead of feeling better about the disappointment, I feel worse. Spend time alone with God and left Him have it. All of it. There isn’t much good in this phase, but there is the bad and the ugly. Bringing our resentment to God begins the healing process.

2. Trust God has our back. Sometimes I hear the whisper that God is holding out on me. It’s the same lie Satan told Eve in the Garden of Eden. Satan knows what words work to plant the seed of doubt against God. If the lie worked in the beginning of time, why stop now? How do we combat this lie? With Scripture. Psalms 9:10, (NIV) says, “Those who know your name trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you,” or Psalms 31:14, (NIV) “But I trust in you, LORD; I say, “You are my God.” Pretty much peruse the book of Psalms and we can find verses on building our trust with God.

3. Submit to God. I don’t know about you, but this one is tough for me. I’m strong willed and God is continually humbling me to submit my will to His. Every time I think I have the process down and I’m willing to replace my desires for God’s, something else pops up which challenges this. Psalms 143:10 (NASB) states, “Teach me to do Your will, For You are my God; Let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground.” Most recently, my work began partnering with a large university offering discounted tuition for full time employees. I jumped at the idea of getting another degree, with a discount no less, because apparently I think I need more than the two degrees I have. I signed up for more information and the recruiters have been calling me everyday to find out my area of interest and if I could start at the upcoming semester. I took a step back over the weekend and spent time alone with God while the house was still quiet and dark. The answer I received was a resounding “No, now is not the time to start another degree.” My initial reaction was rebellion and resentment. God knows I enjoy learning, why can’t I do this now?

The situation inspired this blog post as I worked through each one of these steps. I’m not sure what God has up His sleeve for me in the coming months or years, but I trust it will be better than earning another degree.

Are there times when you get stuck in any of these steps? Or has resentment kept you from God only to realize what He planned out was for the best? Share your experience in the comments.